Participant's starting situation
BH was referred to the mentoring programme by his course tutor. Immediately after signing up to the programme it was brought to light that there are several agencies involved with BH.
BH had disclosed to college staff several preexisting safeguarding concerns which he has just now started receiving support in. BH has very recently received news that his biological father has been diagnosed with a terminal illness and is struggling to come to terms with it.
BH has stated that his relationship with his father has been very distant and is looking for support to enable him to see his father.
BH barriers to completing his apprenticeship consisted of emotional distress and trauma from several preexisting factors, family bereavement, PSTD and attachment issues that he was struggling to comprehend as he feels his past support from multiple agencies did not address his issues. He has stated on multiple occasions that he struggles to open to working professionals as they always change and fails to trust.
From initially engaging in BH it was clear that there were still several outcomes barriers that he was still dealing with and this was an ongoing issue he was still coming to terms with.
To start with I was required to seek out additional financial support for BH, as he is studying an apprenticeship he is unable to seek support to enable BH to help him visit his father who lives in Cornwall as this was the first immediate barrier that we could address and overcome.
Met with Student services SMT and discussed options with how we can help and support BH through this difficult time. Through discussions with them I was able to access a small pot of funding to provide BH opportunities to travel down and visit his father, by purchasing a rail card for BH and providing him two trips paid by the college to visit him in Cornwall. I met with BH following this to start the process of applying for a pass and working out the transportation.
Following the meeting with Student Services, BH dropped into Student Services G75 looking for myself as he has just received further upsetting news about his recently deceased father. BH disclosed that he is taking a lead role in the organising of this father funeral.
BH was upset and distressed over the situation as he needed to attend the crematorium later that afternoon. He had come to realisation that this would be the last time he sees his father before he would be cremated and was struggling to come to terms with this. He seeks guidance and reassurance that he was able to face this situation alone.
BH left the session more positive than he when he attended and went off to the crematorium to sort of the funeral for his father.
BH returned to Student Services looking for myself as he wanted to give me an update, BH stated that his father passed away since last seeing him. BH was very apologetic to the college as he felt he was wasting staff time in college for helping him with his problems. BH showed clear signs that he is in shock and have been assured that the correct levels of support will be offered to him.
BH further disclosed that he is taking the lead role in organising his father funeral with help from one of his grandparents.
BH attended his appointment with me following a week off from helping support his grandmother in organising his father funeral. BH expressed that he was sad and will always have sadness that his father passed away but recognised that it will improve over time. He also stated that he now feels much more at ease now the funeral has happened for two reasons. One that he does not have to worry about him anymore, secondly, he was happy that as a result of the funeral it has brought his family closer and together. He said it was almost like it was his father’s parting gift to bring the family back together.
We discussed how the funeral went also. He was emotionally sad at it was his father’s funeral but happy to see that his father was well loved by his family and friends. His father’s friends all comforted BH by telling him all about his father and he will well receive and loved. They reminisced over stories and tales about what they had done.
BH spent some period of time talking about how now he feels at ease from knowing that his father is at rest and that he has the correct support networks are in place for him. He is now feeling positive about his future but understands that there will be good days and also bad days.
BH has kept open lines communications between himself and the college which includes his tutors, head of facilities and Student Support and understands that remaining on regular contact with these services will help him from this process and academic year. His attendance is very high as well as his current work he is actually ahead.
We discussed what the next steps are for with sorting out his father’s house and his belongings. we discussed about how he felt about this and is he okay with it. He is happy that he is the one to go through his father’s belongings as he can pick and choose what he can keep and what to be thrown away. He feels that this is the last part of the process for him to say goodbye.
My role as a mentor was to offer information advice and guidance for BH. I ensured that I was consistent with BH and providing him with support through making decisions and ensuring the information provided was clear, impartial and non-basis so he can make a clear decision on what actions to take. Sessions involved myself signposting him to the relevant.
I supported BH through ensuring he kept in regular contact with the college and his apprenticeship as he felt he did not want to be a burden to them with offloading information about his personal life to them but to ensure he needs keep communication lines with them.
BH was referred to an inhouse college counselling session whilst he waited for his CAHMS referral.
At the of the session we agreed that he will wait until after his Father funeral to them start accessing CAHMS support. This is an action that needs to be carried forward before I meet with BH again.
As this is still an ongoing issue as this is going to require more support and advice and guidance for BH.
What BH feedback from the support he has received through the programme and found staff very relatable and consistent which has helped him maintain his college work and importantly his apprenticeship he is current partaking in which he enjoys.
The next steps for BH will involve him still accessing the programme until he feels he does not require mentoring.
BH is due to start accessing his CAHMS appointment to receive the correct counselling support from the professional.